The Writting on the Wall

As we have been praying about our up-coming move, I confess I have been asking the Lord to give us a clear sign that we are indeed going to the place He has hand picked for us.  I would love to wake up one morning or look up from my time in prayer and see our new country name written on the wall or scrolling across my computer.  The Father was so very specific 5 years ago that we were to go to Turkey.  I know He will be specific again; it's the waiting that is hard. 

Last week, I was reading the account in the book of Daniel of when a hand appeared before King Belshazzar and wrote in a special cryptic language a warning on the wall.  The prophet Daniel was called upon to interpret the message.  It occurred to me during my reading what great courage it took for Daniel to go before the king.  Yes, this was not his first time to deliver a message from the Lord; however, in that time of history to go before a ruler was often a matter of life or death.  It took great faith for Daniel to even enter the throne room (banquet hall).  It makes me ask 2 questions: 1) How boldly am I entering THE Throne Room? and 2) Am I able to interpret His message? 

I'll address the second question first.  Learning to speak someone's language is challenging.  I am not talking about a "foreign" language - although that's hard.  I'm talking about knowing someone well enough to understand how they communicate.  After 15 years of marriage, Matt and I are learning what it takes to communicate well.  We all have our crazy quirks when it comes to life's messages.  If I ask, "Does this look good on me?"  Matt knows that to give a positive reply without a good look will most certainly aggravate me.  He also knows that to hesitate and stare too long at me will be interpreted as, "no the outfit is not for you!"  (First immediate impressions are important with clothes!)    On the flip side, I know that when Matt calls to ask if he needs to do anything on the way home, he wants the answer to that question and nothing else.  He is not being rude.  He will say he missed me and ask me about my day later.  He just needs to know if he has tasks that need to be accomplished.  How do we figure these things out in relationships?  TIME!  and a lot of asking for FORGIVENESS!   I know that my God speaks to me.  The question really is, do I know HIM well enough that I speak His language!  I think sometimes the writing really is already on the wall.  We simple don't know how to read it.

How can we be confident that we know when the Lord is speaking?  Experience.  As we learn to listen and respond to Him, it becomes easier and easier to interpret His messages.  I think this was the case with Daniel.  He did not know what was written on the wall.  He simply went to the banquet hall to read the message.  He knew that if the message was from the Lord, he could read it.  Why did he know this.  He had a relationship and a life time of walking daily with the King of Kings.  If I want to know when the Lord is speaking to me, I am going to have to choose to spend time with Him often...not just when I need an answer! 

I know He has a perfect plan for our family.  I know that He still works miracles and still writes on the wall.  AT         

Ex-Pat does not Equal Extrovert!

One of the things that I have found especially challenging about living overseas is the fact that I am by God's design an introvert.  I think most people assume that because I have surrendered to following God's calling overseas it means that I am an extrovert.  Well, I am NOT!!  In fact, the last three years have stretched me more than I can even express.  It is totally out of my comfort zone to: make new relationships; make a fool of myself speaking in a foreign language; have people stare at me constantly; have people ask me questions about everything in my life; and the list goes on and on!!  Recently, a friend of mine posted The 12 rules for Introverts list on Facebook.  I can totally relate to all of them, and at the same time, I can give you countless examples of times when I have been forced to live outside of my natural personality and embrace the life of an extrovert.  Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."    I know that the Father is working the extrovert experiences I have had for my good.  He is growing me for His glory.  However, I confess, it has really stressed me at times.  Also, this life calling doesn't stop when we return to the U.S.  I freely admit I am VERY nervous about the coming months.  We are going to be traveling and sharing non-stop.  Although I am very passionate about all that the Father is doing overseas, I am still apprehensive about being so open with so many.  Please remember me (and William) in the coming months.  May we be emboldened for Him.  May we learn to rely on His strength and trust Him that He has plans for Introverts living in an Extrovert world!  AT   

All I Want To Do

It has now been 8 weeks since we left Turkey.  Yes, it has been wonderful to be with family and friends, but I confess, I am already longing to be back overseas.  I am daily seeking His direction, but my heart is hurting to be back with the people and culture I have grown to love.  I know in so many ways this is yet another example in my life of trying to be in control and not being content with where the Father has me.  Why do I keep taking my life back into my own hands? I read a quote recently that said "It's only when you are tested that you truly discover who you are.  And it's only when you're tested that you discover who you can be." (author unknown)  1 Peter 5:10 says, "And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you."  James 1:12 says, "Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him."  I know my battle is between what I know in my head and what I often feel in my heart.  For the most part, I am a rational person that is not swayed in my life's walk just because of my emotions, but well, I ammmmmm still a girl.  Sometimes I let my emotions get the better of me.  I know that God has a perfect plan for me/my family.  I know that He desires to use this time to stretch and grow me.  I know that I can rest in His promises and the sovereignty of His scripture.  I am asking today that my emotions/feelings get in alignment with His truth.  My heart song to the Father today is "All I want to do is give this life to you." (Ginny Owens "All I Want To Do")  Whatever He has for me next, may I be completely surrendered.  AT

Picking Up A Pole!

Matt is spending a great deal of his time right now frantically reading and writing papers.  He had hoped to finish all of his work before coming State side, but, as you know by now, that choice was taken out of our hands.  SO, I would like to take the first part of this post to publicly thank him for all of his hard work for our family.  I am so proud of his dedication and ability to juggle so many responsibilities with integrity and love.  One of the books that Matt has been reading is, Tentmaking.  In this book, George Verwer is quoted as saying, "Most churches are keepers of the aquarium, not fishers of men."  Wow, that is quite a convicting statement.  We have now been in Texas over a month.  How many times have I shared the gospel?  What are my intentions over the next 5 months for sharing the gospel?  Yes, my "job" during my State Side Assignment is to encourage the church and share what the Father is doing around the world.  However, when should I ever put personal evangelism aside?  Yes, I want to encourage Believers to get involved around the world, but this statement is a good reminder that we all need to be actively engaging the "un-reached" right in our neighborhoods.  May we not be caught simply cleaning our own aquariums....may we be always working to add to the tank!!  AT 

Pursuing HIM

It has been a joy re-connecting with family, friends and U.S. culture (and food!) over the last few weeks.  I feel blessed to have so many people in my life that love me unconditionally.  My heart has been encouraged.  Now that the initial "welcome home" meetings are over, many are beginning to ask - "What's next?"  This is a great question, and I truly, TRULY wish I had the answer.  I know that God will reveal His will in His perfect timing, so for now we are simply spending each day pursuing Him.  Jeremiah 29:13 says, "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart" Psalm 9:10 says, "Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you."  Deuteronomy 4:29 says, "But if from there you seek the LORD your God, you will find him if you look for him with all your heart and with all your soul."  These are the verses that we are hiding in our hearts and claiming as promises today.  We know that in proclaiming His goodness and trusting in His plan, we will always be in His perfect will for our lives. Matt often quotes his childhood pastor by claiming,  "We cannot possess what we do not pursue!".  Meaning in this situation: We desire to possess the knowledge of which country God has for us; therefore, if we actively pursue this knowledge, we can trust that He will reveal it to us.  Several years ago, I watched for the first time the Will Smith movie, The Pursuit of HAPPYness.  Although, some would claim that the emphasis of this film is on materialism and finding a "place in society".  At this time in my life, I am choosing to be encouraged through this movie to "not give up" despite life's circumstances.  I pray that if you are facing a time in your life when you are either not seeing God move or questioning His plans for you, that you will be encouraged today to continue seeking Him.  Keep Pursing!  AT  

Freedom in HIM

This year the 4th of July was celebrated, quite unexpectedly, with our feet on American soil.  Yes, we were planning to return to the U.S. this fall for a 4 month Stateside assignment; however, on June 29th at 5:30 pm we received word that we needed to be out of country no later than the Wednesday of the coming week. (Independence Day!)  This left us 4 days to pack our entire house; get our affairs in order (not knowing if we would ever be able to return); prepare to be in the U.S. at least 6 months; prepare to possibly go to a temporary country after that; and begin thinking about the possibility of needing to move on to another country of service.   No, we were not totally taken off guard.  There have been some surrounding circumstances, but the weight of it all was/is still hard to stand up under at times.  We cried a lot, stared blankly into bare rooms as things were packed, laughed at our crazy packing methods; and of course, did a lot of praying that the Father would give us wisdom and strength.  I am sure we will spend the next couple of months over eating; re-connecting with friends; loving on family; and prayerfully processing much of what we have been through.  Yes, our "rights" have been taken in Turkey, but we are trusting the Father to lead us over the next 6 months in the U.S. and remind us of the wonderful freedom we have in HIM.  We really desire to connect with all of you.  Please feel free to contact us.  We are happy to plan times to meet with you personally as well as share with your small groups and/or churches.  AT

Godly Hoping OR Standing on Faith

Last Saturday, we drove an hour north up to the Black Sea to spend a day at the beach.  Besides a little over exposure to the sun, (I am SOOO white...well, now red!) it was a wonderful day.  On the drive up, we passed several rode-side-stands selling towels, mats and various beach items.  We decided to stop and buy the kids some blow-up tubes.  I am so glad we did - it was the hit of the day!!  The kids thoroughly enjoyed floating along without a care in the world.  Oh, to be a kid again...carefree!  I, on the other hand, spent a good deal of the day walking along the beach making sure that the current was simply taking them down the shoreline and not out to the deep, a shark was not stalking them, their tubes didn't pop, etc., etc.  You see I had "cares"!  However, as I watched the kids laughing, giggling, splashing and playing, I was struck with how important faith is.  How I need to surrender my "cares" into His most capable hands.  William and Grace had complete faith in their situation.  Did they fully understand the dangers of the undertow or other such things - no!  Did they need to - no!  It is enough that their father said, "Go and do this thing."  I so desire to float along in faith just like that.  Sadly, I often spend way too much time checking the tide and asking multiple times if my Father really does want me to "go and do this thing".  I feel myself acting like the  Disney elephant character, Tantor, from the 1999 Tarzan movie =  "Are you sure this water's sanitary? It looks questionable to me!"   I so wish I would instead stand boldly like David when hearing of the giant Goliath taunting the army of God. =  “The Lord, who delivered me from the paw of the lion and from the paw of the bear, He will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine.” (1 Sam. 17:37)  I know that I can only stand on faith when I have hidden the Word of God in my heart and have faith in my relationship with Him.  That means fully surrendering control to HIM.  It will be at that time that I can boldly say, "for the battle is the Lord’s"! (1 Sam. 17:47)  David was still just a shepard boy, but how had he spent his time in the fields?  He spent it worshiping and drawing near to the Father.  It was because of this relationship that he had faith that God's will for his life was enough.  Live or Die - let God decide.  It always gets my blood pumping when I read, "David hurried and ran toward the army to meet the Philistine." (1 Sam. 17:48)  David didn't wait and check the sky for the right conditions; check the grass for obstacles; ask God for a set course of action, etc. David took what he had and knew how to use and charged forward!  I love how the Living Bible records the next two verses:  Deuteronomy 31:6, "Be strong!  Be courageous!  Do not be afraid of them!  For the Lord your God will be with you.  He will neither fail you nor forsake you."  John 14:27, "I am leaving you with a gift -  peace of mind and heart!  And the peace I give isn't fragile like the peace the world gives.  So don't be troubled or afraid."  We CAN "float along carefree"!!  Why? Because:  He will keep His promises; He is in control; and HE loves us more than we can ever imagine! Floating Away Today - AT